BTS- A JOURNEY FROM NOONE TO LOVE
BTS – MY COSMOS HEALING
I think its impossible for me to write what BTS means to me , this is the best chance to express what i truly feel , although i cant express even in millions of books if i write, yes i love them so much that maybe you can count stars in entire cosmos , its that impossible to measure my love, they weren’t with me with start , but definitely i’m gonna keep them till my end forever.
I remember i’ve known them since idol era , as in 2018 , but not being a much stan i never particularly stanned anyone , but as we say “destiny” or “fate” , when its meant to be happened , it happens , whether you accept or not. Maybe even if i was late , there has not been a single moment BTS made me smile , to believe myself , most importantly LOVE MYSELF even in the darkest, i remember i had stopped loving myself entirely but then , fate, THEY came , the 7 angles i needed the most in my life . I remember i was so pissed about the stories of BTS , my friends were damm crazy , they still are , haha , so what happened was , i had “sweared” i wont stan , but , as time passed by i got more inquisitive on my ow, which lead me in this fandom. I was afraid at start whether without merch or album you can be army or not , but when i read , for being an army , true emotions are required, i became one. JULY 2020 will be my forever memory.
When i had gone crazy about everything , when i was lost , i cried with them , i still in my lowest imagine and will forever ever imagine them next to me , hugging me , whenever something wrong happens , in the end i know BTS i can go to them , and eventually i started healing , i wont say i have learned completely how to love myself , but most definitely i stopped hating myself, i stopped comparing myself to others personally, when someone else does , i let it pass with a smile because i know i’m great , opinions can never matter to me , never .
Thank you so much BTS for entering , you’ve been the most special people to me and will forever remain , when an army said “the reason i keep waking up is BTS” , i cried badly that day , because its true, i got my motivation to live, got wings to fly , got confidence to face people , got motivation to love myself , yes i love myself a lot because of them , and i’m still learning how to love myself. BTS taught me its okay to be at lowest.
I’m learning from BTS , living my life fullest , not giving up , pursuing my dreams , being proudly an individual , conquering my fears , and most importantly , do what makes you happy.
Ever since i’ve been an army , many people i came across were like “why bts?” , my own parents blame everything to BTS for no reason , i remember my elder sister called me a “toxically obsessed person” threw a lot hate , belittled my emotions around this band and even questioned how sincere fan i am . But when i started growing up with them, i started learning more about their message , i’ve known my relationship with them , and that i only can understand , its my connection , defined by me only , and it roots from this fact that noone else was there for me when THEY were there.
It will always be difficult to put into a story or merely a sentence , the impact of BTS on me , but in short : BTS made my life , they helped my build myself back up when i had nothing , never expected anything , just happiness and the kindness is that is why ill still be here , 10 , 15,20,30,40 years from now , call me whatever you want.
Ah i didn’t realized that i have been writing for so long and even crying , haaha , i got too emotional ..
i think i should end now, i’ve my coaching now , but trust me , my letter IS STILL INCOMPLETE ,, the story of us can never be complete .
i want to see them , meet them , hug them and thank them , even if i have to wait for million years , i’ll do , i will honestly do .
WHEN ITS FATE , THERE ARE NO COINCINDENCES , THERE ARE TIMES WHEN YOUR FATE CHOOSE YOU , BUT I DECIDED TO LOVE MY FATE THAT CHOSE ME…
STANNING BTS WAS THE BEST DECISON EVER, I THANK MY FATE TO CHOOSE THEM.
- GAURIKA AGARWAL
- INDIA, AGE-17